Book Review; I Know Everything- Matthew Farrell

A psychologist grapples with his own sanity as murder evidence mounts against him.

Published by Thomas & Mercer 

Released 6th August 2019

Page count 320

GoodReads

i know everything

Synopsis:

Police investigator Susan Adler is ready to close the book on a deadly car accident, but after the medical examiner discovers evidence of foul play, she knows she has a murder on her hands. The victim was the wealthy wife of Randall Brock, a renowned psychologist who treats patients with disturbing, brutal fantasies. And just like that, Susan’s got a suspect. Continue reading “Book Review; I Know Everything- Matthew Farrell”

Mini Review; The Retreat- Sherri Smith

How Well Do You Really Know Your Friends?

Published by Forge

Released 13th August 2019

Page count 352

GoodReads

theretreat sherri smith

Synopsis:

Four women.
Four secrets.
A weekend that will change them forever…if they survive.

Katie Manning was a beloved child star until her mid-teens when her manager attacked and permanently scarred her face, effectively ending her career and sending her on a path of all-too-familiar post-Hollywood self-destruction.

Now twenty-seven, Katie wants a better answer to those clickbait “Where Are They Now?” articles that float around online. An answer she hopes to find when her brother’s too-good-to-be-true fiance invites her to a wellness retreat upstate. Together with Katie’s two best friends–one struggling with crippling debt and family obligations, one running away from a failed job and relationship–Katie will try to find the inner peace promised at the tranquil retreat. But finding oneself just might drudge up more memories than Katie is prepared to deal with. Continue reading “Mini Review; The Retreat- Sherri Smith”

The Horror Of Sex In Fiction

I’ve found myself considering one of the biggest differences between my experiences of male and female writers of horror.

SEX…

A little foreword first;
What I want to say by no means encompasses all authors. My own reading choices make up a minuscule selection of the horror genre, I’ll be talking about my own opinion based on my reading experiences.
I’ll briefly reflect on my recent reading history to show you what I’m working from.

*****
This year so far I’ve read 87 books.

31 were horror. (I found this quite surprising actually, I’d expected the number to be above 36%)

10 written by 10 different FEMALE authors

20 written by 17 different MALE authors
(4 of these titles were Jonathan Janz)

1 Co-written

-SUB-GENRES included fantasy, thriller, gothic, supernatural, body horror, sci-fi, survival, post apocalyptic and coming-of-age.

6 of them could be considered YA and 4 of those are marketed as such.

It may also be interesting to note that all were published within the past decade with the exception of two male written horrors first released in the 80s.
*****

As I embark on my 32nd horror novel of 2019, (Jonathan Janz’ The Darkest Lullaby – review here) I’ve found myself considering one of the biggest differences between my experiences of male and female writers of horror.

SEX.

We’ve all seen terrible examples of men writing erotica on twitter. Those snippets of ridiculous, eye-rolling, sometimes nauseating scenes. Almost always throwing about words like cunt, snatch or whatever derogatory term they can think up for vagina.
In horror especially I find this irritating.

It feels like men are trying to disgust you with sex, making it as tawdry or just gross as possible to elicit shock or unease in the reader.
Let me tell you, it doesn’t work! I’m not shocked, I’m not uneasy. I’m just rolling my eyes at the transparent attempt to force emotion. I find it juvenile and it immediately lowers my respect for the writing.

Now I’m by no means prudish. But seriously? A third of the male written horror books I read put serious focus on genitalia. Specifically male genitalia.
There were giant slimy naked monsters with dicks longer than their arms- come on now, that’s just funny! All the effort you put into describing these fearsome beasts and now I’m imagining them tripping over their own penises.
Dicks growing out of a house interior.-Now that was bizarre. Being raped by a ‘hardwood’ floor? Door handles warping into cocks? Consider any suspense obliterated. If I’m not almost-laughing at such childish ideas then I’m definitely annoyed to have shattered.
There’s nothing more wasteful then spending pages, chapters even, building that sense of dread or slow creeping tension to have it culminate in a brawl where someone gets dick-slapped. 

I’ve read about victim being swallowed hole by vampire vaginas and a fountain that pours out cum instead of water- that one was particularly gross actually. My stomach flipped at the thought so I guess maybe that guy got the reaction he wanted. But I can’t say it made me want to keep reading.
I’m not bothered enough by it to put the book down but I read horror to be scared, shocked, tense, thoughtful and many other things that do not count disgusted or a little queasy.

In all the female written horror books I’ve read I have never come across erotica being used to disgust. To scare? Yes, absolutely.
But rather than giant monsters swinging their impossibly big dicks around, (as found in 7 of the 20 male horror novels I’m discussing!) the women creep into your own psyche or put you straight into their characters shoes.
Using sex to frighten readers only has real impact for me when done by women. They bring a subtlety and purpose to the writing that evokes a completely different reaction.
Perhaps this is just because I too am female?
We could easily discuss the societal aspects of this topic but that’s not the point I’m making today.

Some of my favourite horrors are set between 1970 and 1999 so I’m really appreciative of the similarities arising in some of the recent publications I’ve read.
I love the small town, old school vibes I found in many of those 31 books.
But gentleman please, leave the sex-shock trend behind where it belongs would you? I’m bored with it.

Blog Tour Review; The Darkest Lullaby- Jonathan Janz

Page Count 304 / Publication date Aug 2019/ Publisher Flame Tree Press

Good Reads link

darkestlullaby.png

 

Synopsis:

Ellie Crane doesn’t believe in demons or vampires, but she still hates the idea of moving into a creepy old house. But when her husband’s aunt bequeaths them a sprawling forest estate, Ellie finds herself stuck in a setting straight out of a horror movie. Then the real horror begins…

Continue reading “Blog Tour Review; The Darkest Lullaby- Jonathan Janz”

Accepting My Diagnosis pt2

Today I am bed bound. My hands and feet feel prickly and ice cold, my arms and legs are just useless sacks of wet heavy sand. As a child did you ever playfully punch eachother in the fleshy part of your triceps or thighs and shout DEAD LEG? Imagine this was done to every muscle in your body. That’s what M.E CFS is to me.

Myalgic Encephalomyelitis also known as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome effects 250,000 people in the UK alone. Two thirds of which are women aged between 20-40 years old. Just. Like. Me.

I was diagnosed after all other tests came back negative. My regular GP was unavailable and I’d been to see an alternative. After reviewing my medical history, discussing all the symptoms I’d had recurring for the past 2 years and looking at yet another set of inconclusive blood tests he insisted this was infact ME CFS.

I was relieved, angry and scared.
Relieved to finally have an answer.
Angry in my refusal to accept a new weakness.
Scared of the reality that this might not go away.

There is no ‘cure’ or medication that will help me. There is no proof of my condition to wave in the face of the eye-rollers and non-believers. Even those I love who I know love me in return can’t always hide their expressions well enough. I can see when they’re frustrated with me. I can see when they think I’m being dramatic. I can see when they wonder if I’m just a hypochondriac.

There is a long list of symptoms relevant to ME CFS, including the 75% below which apply to me

-Persistent fatigue
-Aching muscles and joints
-Pins and needles
-Poor circulation
-Muscle cramps and twitching
-Headaches
– Poor temperature control
– IBS
– Bloating
– Hypersomnia
– Memory problems
– Word finding difficulty
– Loss of balance
– Sensitivity to sound

and my personal worst… PAYBACK.
Also known as post exertional malaise.

It’s payback that has me lying here in bed this morning. Though this time I’m not sure what exactly I’m being paid back for.
Usually all my symptoms attack at once if I’ve been active. Maybe I went out for the day, did some shopping, socialised with friends, walked too much or drove too far. Never anything major- just normal day to day life, except for me these kind of activities are punishable now.
Today I’m not even strong enough to raise my arms and brush my own hair. I have to rest and recharge my body’s dodgy battery.

What’s worst about this is the way MEcfs combines so easily with my anxiety. Every second I rest my brain is shouting at me for wasting precious time. Since I’m not at work I should be cleaning, learning, creating.. DOING something. But this isn’t physically possible so I’ll beat myself mentally instead; why can’t I just THINK my way out of this? FORCE myself out of bed and be productive?

I’ve learned now that to ignore my limitations will only increase the suffering they call ‘payback’, I have no choice but to rest when these moments come. And you know what else? It doesn’t matter if other people don’t understand it, or don’t believe me, I know how I feel and I know what I need.
The next battle is with my brain, all that remains is to silence my irrational guilt and self disgust.